Update on Here We Go Again, posted Nov. 5

To those that have asked about the status of the 22 year-old who's wife had to have their pre-mature baby daughter delivered early when Mom ran into health problems:

Mom and Baby Daughter are doing remarkably well, thank you for all the good thoughts and prayers! In fact, they are due home very soon, in time for the Holidays.

As I indicated in the original story (you can read that here),  Young Father hasn't worked for his company long enough to be covered by their group insurance, nor had he amassed enough vacation or sick time to cover his time loss.

Certainly, it's hard enough what the family was going through, but to have short or no paychecks was simply kicking a guy when he was down.

Thankfully - and this is HUGE -  this company has a policy where employees can donate their unused sick time to a general fund for such.  Many companies have policies where employees can donate their time directly, as does this company.

So, Young Father is being covered for his time off to be with Mom and Baby Daughter by donation of unused sick time from co-workers directly, as well as from their corporate general fund for sick time.

For everything out there that's negative, there still remains those ever lovely silver linings.

Making 5 Year-Olds Look Bad

"Waaaaaaaahhhh!"  says the five year-old, while kicking and screaming in a classic juvenile temper-tantrum.

Lately, we have to suffer this:



Then there's the increasingly popular Murder-Suicide, where, usually, some dufus decides "If I can't have my wife/girlfriend/children, no one can!"

Each situation bears striking resemblance to the others.

All are done by some poor fool that finally recognizes he's lost his battle, and he lacks the skills to reason the situation to an acceptable conclusion for all parties.

In the Murder-Suicide, it's clear they get the order incorrect.  Suicide first, please!

Five year-olds will grow up and learn coping skills and cease temper tantrums as a technique for getting their way.

Conservatives, apparently, not so much.

h/t my Twitter friend, @StopBeck for his insightful tweet!

A Half-Hour Before Sex

Thanksgiving at the Norse Hall.  I am Norwegian.  No one else in attendance was. They were all Finnish or Swedish, and mostly both. 

I was asked what time it was, and I looked up at the clock and noticed the time, marked in Norwegian.

It was half an hour before Seks.  And that's what I said. 

It upset a couple of people.

I was only trying to be accurate.  Really.

Barbarians in the Palace

And educated people used to believe that the earth was flat and later that a lobotomy would cure mental illness.

History will understand these people for the barbarians they are.   I just wish they wouldn't bank on people not figuring them out sooner.  MOST of us already have.

Thank you to my Twitter friend, Guillaume, screen name Seriou, a tireless advocate of Progressive Values and formidable #tcot thorn.  I am proud to call you my friend.

Scratch that! Open Letter to EVERYONE

This started out as an open letter to Senator Orrin Hatch.  Then the choirs began chiming in this morning.

To declare that a "Holy War" will be waged over the proposed Quality, Affordable Health Care for All Americans, HR 3590 - the Senate Democratic proposal for Health Care Reform - is the most irresponsible, disrespectful, disastrous and despicable thing I think I've ever heard - especially coming from a heretofore respected member of the United States Senate.

I've always respected, and at times wandered or even ran into the melee, over religious "rights".  I've worked with Evangelicals and Mormons over the years, with a great degree of success in the end.

Years ago, when embarking on what turned out to be a very successful community project, we were faced with working with the local stake of the Mormon Church.  Mr. Blondetwit wasn't at all comfortable with this to begin with, and was beginning to panic.

I commented to him, "What the hell's your problem? You sound like a straight man being pushed into a gay bar!"

Mr. Blondetwit responded, "What if they try and convert us?"

Gee dear, "Just how convertible are you?"  The exchange changed his perspective permanently.

People that know who and what they are and believe can't be converted.  It's pretty simple.  Or so I thought.

I never worried much about it.  I have a significant biblical education.  I've also studied - at great length - the Koran, The Book of Mormon and the Pearl of Great Price, the Kaballah, and a few other things.  I prefer Winnie the Pooh.  I'm only partially kidding.

For every person who's ever tried to convert me, and there's been many, it took no time to determine that their understanding of what they were proseletyzing was inferior to my own understanding.  When you don't understand it, you look the fool - not just zealous.

I used to be "there" once.  That's how I got started learning everything else.  A teenage journey gone awry you might call it.  I wanted to be able to argue my "beliefs" to anyone who came my way and would challenge me.  And I couldn't!  I mean, I couldn't even fake it!  No matter how I tried to support it, I could not. 

All of this is so similar to people who send out the endless email hoaxes...they think they know, it seems to make sense, and someone they got it from said they "checked Snopes, and it's TRUE".  Well, no, it's not.

There's a problem that arises when you can't any longer support your argument.  You must build a fortress to protect it.  A way to keep out dissent.  A community to support your common beliefs, no matter how flawed.  And the longer it goes on, the deeper the protection must get.  The harsher the rhetoric to drown out the dissent.  Any dissenters from within are handled within, until they're expelled, and then they're discredited to the outside.  For everyone thrown out, more are taken in.  It's a net gain.

Why anyone would want to possess a and espouse a philosophy so flawed, I don't quite understand.  But then again, Mr. Blondetwit has a worn out old Seattle Mariners t-shirt he won't let go of either.  I've never thought it was harmful to me, so I never made a move to eliminate it.  Same with people and their religions.  Not any more.

Some call me an atheist.  I don't.  I don't have any need to be called anything at all.  I have a quiet understanding of my place in the Universe.  You call that "faith".  Only I don't have white knuckles to go along with my faith.  I've never had the need to defend my lack of "faith".  I still don't now, because the laws of this land - currently - protect me from having to defend it.

But you people have crossed the outrage line.

As a person OF religion, you have NEVER been persecuted in this country - it's a primary factor this country is all about.  Freedom OF RELIGION guarantees your freedom from persecution.

So, what have you done with that freedom?  You've sought to eliminate my freedoms and the freedoms of others in the name of your religions.  In regards to health care, you've managed to make health care into a system that is no longer accessible by me.  It didn't use to be that way.  I used to go to the doctor and pay the bill on my way out the door.  In thousands of communities around this country, many don't realize that there are no physicians that are not captive in HMO or like entities.  If you don't belong, you can't access.  And they do not accept people with pre-existing conditions.  For all the people who are struggling with chronic diseases like Lupus, MS, etc., we didn't bring these things on ourselves. 

I won't even discuss all the other things you fight in the name of your religions.  Perhaps you should sit back, not talk and listen to your friends, but perhaps to your God.  You've drowned out the very guidance of your God with the venomous vitriol played on your radios and televisions. 

Up to this point, I've been happy to defend your religious views, but now you're dragging me into your religious actions.  And I'm not allowing you to do that any more.

From here on, I will require of you my religious friend, to know your leadership resume.  The one that chronicles your leadership within your actions.  If you're Christian, I want to know what you've done to speak out about those who murder.  Those who choose to rape this earth God gave us.  And if you're my Muslim friend, I want to know where you've spoken out in leadership against terrorists and the beliefs that lead them to find death more precious than life.  You know who you are.

Senator Hatch and all other elected leaders:  LEAD!  Not by threatening Holy War.  If you don't prevail in this health care debate, so what?  You've lost other battles, many more disastrous than this could possibly be.  But the rest of us are counting on you to do the right thing - and that doesn't involve Holy War.  If you're threatening it, it could only be for one reason - you are on the losing end of this, your argument has run out and is in threat of collapse. 

You have just tipped the final card that tells the rest of us your intentions.  I won't turn my head any more and pass you people off as well-meaning but mis-guided. 

You want a Holy War?  You're on.

Like a child, throwing a temper tantrum on their bedroom floor, surrounded by the toys they won't pick up - be prepared to lose your toys Bubba.  You wrote this script.  And you're giving 5 year old's a bad name.

Satanists in the Neighborhood

They come from near and far.  They point.  They talk about "those people".  "How can they flaunt that right in our faces?" they say.

Oh, it's soooo in their faces too - more so than Macy's Christmas Window.

Stay with this story, as it really illustrates something quite important.

Every year on Thanksgiving, we give thanks for the opportunity to get people all worked up for yet another season of merriment - ours.

It all started about eight or nine years ago, when we decided to do something I'd always wanted to do, but never really had an opportunity, since it takes certain circumstances to pull off.  I really wanted to do it because (duh!) we have cats.  At that time we had - Norman, The King of the Christmas Tree.  He took enormous joy in climbing the trunk and popping out near the top, to my continuous chagrin.  I just wanted to best Ol' Norm.  That's all -really.  At least that's how it started.

The ceiling in our living room peaks at about 12', and with about 30' of windows across the front wall where the peak is, that's a lot of windows.  These windows open onto a wide open neighborhood, where we are very visible at night time and have always provided for a beautiful display at Christmastime for the neighborhood.

The beam at the peak of the ceiling provided our opportunity.  We concocted an aparatus with chains by which we could hang the Christmas Tree, rather than sitting it on the floor.  Upside down.

Because, like, why not?

Here's how it happened:  We got the tree up (7.5'), fully lighted, and proceeded to decorate it.  The decorations hung out from the tree like dangly earrings.  How cool!  Every year the decorating has grown - more dangly and interesting ornaments, and, as planned, less cat interference. Another really neat benefit was that it took up NO floor space, giving us a lot more room for the entertaining we like to do.

Well, with the exception of Abby (story here).  Abby uses the Christmas tree like Tarzan's jungle vine.  But that's another story.  Initially Norman (who died at 13 a couple of years after the first upside down tree) was indeed bested by this hanging Christmas Tree.  I definitely won that round of the cat wars - and he seemed to enjoy that I had. There are ornaments on the tree that look like him, so we call it Norman's tree.

This gets better, truly.

Here's what's transpired as a result:   Some neighbors up the street interpreted this upside down Christmas Tree as a clear sign that we are Satanists.  As all rumors do, this spread.

Really. 

And people have come as word has spread.  It's really beautiful from inside and outside, and it's been amazing to us when we've made the comment of our upside down tree, people remark, "Oh! You're the one's with the Satan Tree?"  This has made it back to us numerous times over the years.

Did you know Satan had a tree?  I didn't either.  If people are really that stupid, we are overjoyed to provide them the fodder for their ignorant selves. 

Merry Christmas.  Merry Xmas.  Happy Hannukah.  Happy Kwanza.  Happy Solstice.  Happy Retailers Bonuses.  Happy Cats.  All of it.

But be careful!  Rumor has it, we MUST be Satanists. 

The really frightening part of this story is that it's totally indicative of today's political and social rhetoric - "Facts" based on simple, uneducated assumptions. 

X's and O's!!! and How to Deal with Sick People

A really special friend, known as GottaLaff on Twitter, reminds me today that it's good to let people know how much they mean to you.

I logged on to Twitter this morning, and, better than fishing at a fishing hole teaming with great fish, GottaLaff popped up with a message right away to me:

I've been struggling with a lupus flare for months now, and I've not been on Twitter as much as I would have liked, and frankly, I miss some of my friends in Twitterville, like Laffy.

After a brief exchange, I told her that she gave me hope.  I didn't mean it as though, "all hope is lost" and "I'm so depressed", but just a simple point of wow!  Someone out there cares!  It's not like I'm this lonely waif with no hope, honestly!

Look at her post - look at the x's and o's - look at all those exclamation points!!!  How could I not feel better with all that?

Here's what it's about, plain and simple.  For all the stupid stuff I'm dealing with (lupus just cycles through, much like a really long rollercoaster with twists and turns, drops and climbs), there is but ONE thing that helps.  Just one thing.

Make me smile.

Mr. Blondetwit gets it, and doesn't really ask "How are you doing?".   My mother hovers, which is really difficult.

Which reminds me to tell you, for everyone asking "How are you doing?", the inquiry is appreciated, as it's honestly nice to know you care, but it's hard to tell the truth, because when your crappy, I don't like to give it the light of day by voicing it directly.  I've learned that it's better to say, "I hope you're feeling better!" I hate being disingenuous by saying, "I'm fine". when clearly I'm not.  I don't lie, so my point is don't take me there.  Lying is the same as giving it voice in the first place.  No one likes to hear someone's crappy - it brings down their day as well. 

When you're face to face with someone struggling with disease, whatever it may be, find something to compliment, even if it's only "It's good to see you smile!"  And you may want to start out by helping to make them smile in the first place.  When you're not face to face and can't see if they're smiling, just tell them you hope they're making progress.  It's that simple.  Wish us peace.  It's always in short supply.

Whatever you do, keep up the x's, o's and those blessed exclamation points!  They're awesome!!!!

XOXOXOXO!!!!!

See, you smiled!  You had to!

You're all very appreciated, by the way!!!!  (Especially GottaLaff!)

By the way, Mr. Blondetwit, may not ask how I'm doing, but he is the King of Cheap Laughs, and that's the finest, most valuable medicine in all the world.  I'm flush with that!

For the rest of you who aren't named here as being appreciated - you know who you are - YOU ARE APPRECIATED TOO! Really!  It would just get a little, well, you know - maudlin - if I started naming you all here.  Thanks!

Here We Go Again

It doesn't matter where you go or what you do, you can't help but run into all the folks rolling under the bus tires of this debate called Health Care Reform.

A young man, 22, married with a small daughter.  This young man, he's a wonderful worker, and a great father I understand.  Unfortunately, his pregnant wife was having problems with the latest pregnancy, and the docs had to take the baby early.  The baby is about a pound and is not doing well.  Neither is Momma.

Mother and baby are out of state at a teaching hospital and medical center for acute care.

While Congresspeople are dilly-dallying around, making inappropriate jokes and references to the Holocaust as they feel it pertains to the current debate, this young family is struggling.

Dad hasn't been employed long enough to have his health benefits yet.  This isn't the employer's decision, it's the insurer's decision.

Gee, I wonder what it's going to cost this young family - if Mom and baby survive.  And what if they don't?

Are any of those people on Capitol Hill going to come help them?